Dealing with Losing


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I have been doing a lot of thinking lately about people who are going thru tough times. Tough times can be losing in relationships, losing out on a job search, losing a promotion, losing a spouse/best friend, or losing your self-esteem. My life as a coach and being involved in college athletics for 30 plus years exposed me to losing.

Losing is a painful dark place that everyone I know has to go thru. Losing is grief, anger, frustration, doubt, fear of being inadequate, and disappointment. The only method that worked for me in dealing with all of these emotions was to accept I didn’t control everything in my life. That is a hard pill to swallow but I realized I could work hard on changing things I did control and that most certainly included my attitude. When you are losing you have to remind yourself any change in results has to START with you working on what you can control.

In areas that I did not control or have any influence on I had to pray. I always have believed that God has a wonderful plan for my life but that it is not my plan.

A song that sums up life and dealing with the disappointments to me is “Sometimes it’s a Bitch” written by Bon Jovi and performed by Stevie Nicks.

Lyrics below:

Well I’ve run through rainbows and castles of candy
I cried a river of tears from the pain
I try to dance with what life has to hand me
My partner’s been pleasure…my partner’s been pain

There are days when I swear I could fly like an eagle
And dark desperate hours that nobody sees
My arms stretched triumphant on top of the mountain
My head in my hands…down on my knees

Sometimes it’s a bitch…sometimes it’s a breeze
Sometimes love’s blind…and sometimes it sees
Sometimes it’s roses…and, sometimes it’s weeds
Sometimes it’s a bitch…sometimes it’s a breeze

I’ve reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I’ve laid down with love and I woke up with lies
What’s it all worth only the heart can measure
It’s not what’s in the mirror…but what’s left inside

Sometimes it’s a bitch…sometimes it’s a breeze
Sometimes love’s blind…and sometimes it sees
Sometimes it’s roses…and, sometimes it’s weeds
Sometimes it’s a bitch…sometimes it’s a breeze

You gotta take it as it comes
Sometimes it don’t come easy

I’ve run through rainbows and castles of candy
And I’ve cried a river of tears from the pain
I tried to dance with what life had to hand me
And if I could…I’d do it all over again

Sometimes it’s a bitch…sometimes it’s a breeze
Sometimes love’s blind…and sometimes it sees
Sometimes it’s roses…and, sometimes it’s weeds
Sometimes it’s a bitch…sometimes it’s a breeze
Sometimes the picture just ain’t what it seems
You get what you want…but it’s not what you need
Sometimes it’s a bitch…sometimes…it’s a breeze
Well it’s a breeze…it’s a breeze…it’s a breeze…

 

 

 

 

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